I have never made a New Years Resolution. EVER. Really. I just don't say something for the sake of saying something, so they are just something I have never done. I have had resolutions on March 8th, June 23rd, and October 27th,for example, but not on January 1st. When I decide to make a change, I just do it, and don't wait for a specific day. This year, I started doing some reflecting, and looking deep inside around mid to late December. I did not like what I saw. I had to figure out why I had become like that, and more importantly what I was going to do to change. Basically, I had to make some changes, and man, change is hard! I figured that I could just try and use all my power to change, and see what happens OR use the best support system in the universe. Sounds easy, but handing over control is not easy for this chick. So the hardest part of change for me is relying on God. Funniest part of this process is that as soon as I relinquish the control, it is like having an army of help. No, I don't have all the answers, and still struggle with my issues, but it has become so much easier to work things out.
So, since I started this journey on/around Jan 1st this year, I am going to say that for the first time, I have "done" some New Years Resolutions!
1 year ago
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good for you! I know how hard change is. mel keeps telling me that i'm stubborn, but i like to call it "slow to change", not UNWILLING...just takes me a little longer than most people. anything you need, just let me know and i'll lend you a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on or a foot to kick your butt with... :)
ReplyDeletechange sucks. i find that i am ALWAYS trying to fix, mend, re-do, improve, grow, mature and so on and so on...and i never seem to get there. or rest. but i think that's life
ReplyDeletee.g. i have been working on the email for you but i can't send it bec i keep seeing that it's me that has the problem. me. not you. that sucks :) haha
the other day in the car when nate said "my daddy is the fixer man, he can fix anything" really smoked me. it's true. so why do i have such a hard time letting him fix everything? kwim? like learning to chill and let god be god and take care of me. esp when i see things in my life that i don't like
then i see nate and i love him so, so much (ESP when he's sleeping haha) and i think man, how much more does god love me? even when i suck at this christian thing....blah!
take comfort. we will stand and say how cool and awesome god is in this land....(my changing that verse around a bit) but it's true
love you
sorry so long!